ONE BODY, MANY WOUNDS
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miracle morning 5

9/21/2019

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Life is all duty and little heart for me these past six months. God gives me a day or two a week maybe where I can feel the confidence of things hoped for, but mostly its a constant battle just to keep the inner ugliness at bay. Its clinical depression, at least in part. Waking up to a sensation like being punched in the stomach. I don't like talking about it. I loathe myself for wanting sympathy. I only write about it because I can't seem to get beyond it yet today, so its all I have. Can I give glory to God in it? Yes. I do. I suffer for the healing of myself, my family, my friends. That we may be saved from this sinful world. Our Lady holds me in her arms, though I cannot feel them. I forget too quickly. Humility. I deserve nothing. My desires for this world do not matter. My duties are a gift, so that I am not idle, and my prayers, however dry, are efficacious by law. Do I take pride in my suffering? Perhaps. But I repent. Whatever God wills, be it life or be it death. May I follow Him. I feel a constant oppressive anxiety to do something, but I don't know what it is. It may just be my will to escape, so I must trust and wait. I love Him and I love you. May He bless you with abundant bread today.
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  • Home
    • Backstory
    • Arts List >
      • Children
    • Links
    • Archive
    • Archive 2
    • Archive 3
  • Trinity & Sanity
    • The Eight Habits
    • Psychology & Spirituality
    • St Joseph & Masculinity
    • Virginity & Feminism
    • Discernment Retreat
    • Mystical Rose
    • Youth Courses >
      • Grammar K-IV >
        • Child Discipling
        • Kindergarten
      • Logic V-VIII
      • Rhetoric IX-XII
    • College Courses >
      • Father I-III >
        • History
        • Sociology
        • Leadership
      • Mother IV-VI >
        • Health
        • Biology
        • Performance
      • Priest VII-IX >
        • Philosophy
        • Physics
        • Communication
      • Child X-XII >
        • Theology
        • Catholic Social Teaching
        • Charity
  • Mission
  • Works
    • Academic Essays
    • Pastoral Essays
    • B-log
    • Poetry
    • Stories
    • Tracks
    • Curriculum
    • Dissertation