There is a beautiful apostolate out of the Colorado-Arizona area named 'Companions of the Holy Spirit'. They have a teaching series called Hearing the Voice of God that is a powerful and prophetic set of lessons about prayer. It emphasizes over and over that God has a special mission in this world for each of us and that God wants us to discover this mission each day in every decision, We discover it through an active relationship, in which we ask to do the Father's will all the time. Its good for me to return to often, since I struggle with thinking that God wants to keep me in the dark, But that is not really the Father's way. The darkness is just to help me focus on that one light that is guiding me forward. My discernment is what the light reveals to me specifically.
H.O.W.S. Heart. Others. World. Scripture. This is their acronym for a good discernment.
The heart is perhaps the most difficult for me. I don't really trust my heart these days. But I'll come back to that. Suffice it to say, I want to give my life to the service of the Catholic Church. It can be vague for now. I love and belong to Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.
Others have consistently pointed me to counselling, preaching, and teaching, none of which are significantly exercised in my current job. I have been trying to build a plan to begin reintegrating these skills, but it needs more substance still. The money issue got in the way for me for awhile. But it was good, I am becoming shrewder and wiser in regards to using money for the service of God.
The world is my history, the plot of the story and the present circumstances of my life. This is closely connected with my heart, because I am a philosophical personality and analyzing the logic of my life is second nature to me, I can't feel good about circumstances that don't make sense with my past.
The scriptures that speak to me of my mission are those about love between Christians. I seek to cultivate in my life a community that loves each other with healing Gospel love. That could be a family or that could be a different kind of religious life or it could be both... but I know it must include sexual integration between men and women.
We'll keep punching out this plan during this 30-days and find a way to start taking the necessary next steps. The Lord has blessed me with the idea of making all the individual steps/goals to be prayers for different intentions. It really helps me not to think about it as self-improvement, but rather as self-gift, so that the whole process itself is part of the love I give you. I don't have to wait until I reach some imaginary 'vocation' before I can be where I want to be in my spirit. That is the only reason that keeps me going, my love for my family and friends.